What a great start to the day... I'm sitting at my computer, listening to beautiful music that my husband recorded ~ he's an awesome musician ~ and I'm just resting in the awareness that God loves and cares for me more than I can possibly imagine. Now, that's what I call a great way to start any day! :) I am so grateful for all that the Lord has done and is doing in me thus far in my life. I'm most definitely a work in progress!
I've been away from the computer for some time now...not posting for quite a while...and quite frankly, wondering if I would ever write another post for this blog. Many wonderful and many very hard things have happened since 2009...things that caused me to re-think who I am and where I am in my walk with the Lord. My life this past year has been very difficult in many ways and I've needed the last several months to put everthing into proper perspective. The Lord and I have been working diligently on me...and I've sure needed it! Guess you could say I've been restructuring and being restructured by God. It was necessary...and it's all good!
I learned many years ago that God is always good ~ even when the things we are enduring may or may not be. Whether they are things of our own design or something that the Lord is bringing into our lives for the purpose of growing us up...whether they are painful experiences or filled with profound joy...He is always at work in us...showing Himself to be good and merciful, gracious and patient, loving and kind, generous and wise. He is always using the things that seem to trickle into our lives... And at times it is only as we journey further down the road of our time on earth that we learn His 'trickles' came with a purpose...came from the heart of the Father who loves us without reservation...unconditionally...and who knows more than anyone ever could just what we need to purify us and set us free from all of those things that hold us down ~ things that keep us from running fully and freely into His loving arms.
My journey this past year has reminded me repeatedly that I need Him moment by moment and that I cannot afford to step away from Him for one second without expecting there to be some sort of price that will be paid for doing so. I've made choices that I wish I'd never made and done things I wish I'd never done...but I've also made decisions that I do not regret. Some of those very decisions have caused me to lose friends and to seek out my Father in heaven with a repentant heart...and a questioning one, too. I look at where my life is right now and know that God's hand has brought me to this place. But I also know that many people would disagree with me about that. They would say that I have walked away from God and that He is not pleased. I only know this...God is a loving Father and long ago I gave Him my life to do with whatever He chooses. I meant it then. I still mean it today. I trust that He has me where He wants me right now...and He confirms that trust in beautiful ways on a daily basis. I regret some decisions, but embrace others. They have all brought me to this wonderful place and time in my life. God is huge, my friends. Don't ever take that for granted. He is simply HUGE!
Things that come to us may appear to be sent by the enemy. I say 'appear' because I believe with all my heart that God can step in at any time to stop them from finding their ways to us. He could intervene and prevent us from being hurt, or making bad decisions because of the temptations we endure. He is, after all, GOD! Now, I don't discount the fact that He's given us a will that is free to choose whatever we choose and that sometimes, we absolutely make the wrong decisions. Nor do I wish to sound as though I am trying to justify sin or wrong choices where my life is concerned. But ultimately, He is and always will be GOD. (Yes, I know...I said that already... I just love the way it sounds... GOD IS GOD... Wonderful!!!)
If He allows things to come to us ~ things that just seem to trickle into our lives ~ it is for a purpose we may or may not understand at the time. But we can most definitely trust that He has us in His tender care. We must continue to put our hands in His everyday, regardless of anything we may encounter. He knows better than anyone how to work everything out for our good ~ and it even says so in the Word... "He works all things together for the good of those who love Him and are called according to His purposes." How reassuring that is! How much peace that brings when we feel as though we've lost our way or gone way too far in our poor decision making ~ or our sins.
I'm reminded of the fact that Jesus ~ perfect, sinless Son of God...our Lord Jesus ~ even asked His Father to take away the cup that he would have to drink... And the Father's answer was no. He could have said yes, but He didn't. He not only chose to say no. In Isaiah 53:10, it says
"Yet it was the Lord's will
to crush Him and cause Him to suffer..."
So, my friends, there it is. I have sinned and fallen short of the glory of God. I have confessed and repented, gotten to my feet once again and continue to hold onto the Master's hand. I have made decisions good and bad...and have held onto the promises that my Lord loves me enough to get me where I need to be. I've watched things 'trickle' into my life...thinking they were good or bad...whatever the case may be...and have been affirmed by God's love for me repeatedly during those times. I have seen the same in others...falling down...getting up again...continuing on their journeys as they endeavor to 'endure to the end'. My job is to love them. To love you, friends. Whatever you encounter on your journey. Whatever you choose to do when those things trickle into your lives. I choose to stay commited to God. I pray that for all of us. That we would find ourselves before His throne on a daily basis...loving and serving Him to the best of our ability...repenting and letting go of our sins...then getting back on the road to follow Him wherever He leads us.
December 19th, 2010 I married Charles. He's a wonderful man ~ a musician, songwriter, arranger and singer...who also plays piano, keyboards, flute and trombone fabulously... and who, most importantly of all, is a true worshipper who loves God dearly and lives his faith in powerful ways daily. I thank God for this man. He is truly a gift in my life. Maybe I'll write more about that later, but for now, it's time to say goodbye. Be blessed, dear friends. Thanks for following my blog. I'll write again soon, I think. It's good to be back.